give me a kiss - what he's done for me

An hour or so passed while we sat in the living room before they came out to pull at our hands and beg to come watch their show.  You know, they really do play well together, brother and sister.  We walked into her room and before us was a stage of two kitchen chairs and a thin curtain made of an old pretty purple and blue bed tent hanging between - the perfect height for these munchkins to disappear behind, yet still short enough to hold their sock covered hands over.

"Grandma, I want to go to the park," said the blue sock.

"Ok, I'll take you there," said the pink.

"Grandma, will you push me on the swing?  Weeeeee!"

"Let's go down the slide"

"Ok"

"The end."

Claps all around for these two puppeteers and embarrassed, yet proud smiles covered their faces while the applause went on.

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"Mommy, give me kiss, I do can-can!"  This came out of my two year old's mouth recently.

Huh?  What did he just say?

Yep, I must of heard it right.  I obliged and gave this small one a kiss.

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"I think I love you more than God does.  I love Him most, but I don't think He can love you more than I do," said Braeden as I was making dinner.

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"Mommy, what if you never come home?  Maybe I won't have a Mommy or Daddy anymore," she said.  She quickly explained that her eyes were only watery because they just hurt, but then she couldn't pretend anymore and the tears began to flow.  "I'll miss you, Mommy.  Please don't leave us."  It was all I could do to hold in my own tears, and I almost gave up, but I have to be brave for this girl, really for all three of them.   My work is to instill in them that God has brought us to this point and will bring us through.  He has shown us over and over that he has provided for us to be here, that He is carrying us through.  They will be loved, I know, and so I must make sure they know, too.  I will tell them and tell them.  And it'll be ok.
All I have to say is I'm so thankful for Skype.  Praising Him for this anticipated piece of technology while I recover hundreds of miles away.

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These moments, seemingly small, are being etched clearly in my memory.  As mommy to these babies, it isn't hard to find myself wondering how they are going to do without me.   Or maybe it's more how I am going to do without them!  

I am thankful today for a reminder from a friend that He has provided.  He has paved the way for us to get this far.  

A task which seemed impossible became possible. 

$14,000 for braces?  We didn't know how, but He provided me with a part time job - literally landed in my lap - covering the exact amount we needed each month, which also allowed me to still be at home.

$75,000 for surgery?  After several denial letters recieved, amazingly insurance came through, though we were warned at the beginning that insurance mostly never helps with this treatment.  And the remaining $32,000 left over for our portion?  Lent to us without interest.

Hotels in the area that are $140 a night at the cheapest.... We didn't know until after the decision to have surgery is made that we have some old friends that just happen to live only 90 miles away - in ALL of California - from where I'll be having surgery.  The amazing part?  They have generously, graciously, and joyfully offered to let us stay for free while we recover.

I am so, so undeserving, yet...  

He takes care of us.

He has provided.

He is faithful.

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 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Philippians 4:6

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

Matthew 11:28

Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.

Matthew 11:29

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us,

Ephesians 3:20

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He has done immeasurably more than I have even asked or imagined.  

I trust His Word and the promises within.  Somehow in those 17 days, He will do work for the good and become known, and I will choose to trust in His provision.